This really nice Nigerian lady emailed me yesterday with an opportunity of a lifetime... 
     "I know this will come to you as suprise but please accept it with cool heart, I work with Manny Bank PLC here in Nigeria, and recently I discovered $11million dollars in the Bank dormant account belonging to one late Mark Davidson from usa this man was confirmed dead in a plane crash some 6years ago and till now no trace or info about his next of kin or relation, I am looking for a trusted person who I can plan a deal with, I will present you to my bank as the brother or relation to late Mark Davidson for the claim of this funds, so that we can share it when I come over to meet with you facialy,there is no risk involved and I am ready to compansate you fine, pls get back to me for more details."

Of course she was fuckin' hot!!



I sent her a picture of me and I believe she was quite taken because she immediately trusted me with this eleven million dollar deal she had been spending a great deal of time and money working on.



Sparks flew and within 24 hours our relationship had blossomed beyond an email affair right into an instant message relationship...  Apparently I'm not very good with girls though cause she dumped me at the end of our first IM conversation....  I think it was because she doesn't like cowboy movies...





Rick Jacobs: How does everything look?
Mary Thomson: am very happy the bank belives ur claim
Mary Thomson: the bank needs 4 documents for approval of this claim on ur name as the beneficiary to the said funds
Rick Jacobs: Do we have those documents?
Mary Thomson: we got just 1 which is the death certificate and still need 3 more
Mary Thomson: the lawyer will help get rest 3 documents for this claim
Mary Thomson: thats why we have him to represent u in the Bank for this claim to look real and legal
Mary Thomson: ok?
Rick Jacobs: Okay, that sounds good to me, I do a lot of business through lawyers so it makes perfect sense.
Mary Thomson: yeah...great
Mary Thomson: all we need to do now is follow the lawyers instructions to avoid any delays or suspicion now that the bank believes ur claim
Mary Thomson: u have to send the death certificate to the bank right away saying ur lawyer Barrister Christopher will get the rest 3 soon
Mary Thomson: ok?
Rick Jacobs: Okay, I can do that without a problem. 
Mary Thomson: good
Mary Thomson: do dat now and let me know so we can talk on the lawyers service charge transfer to him as instructed in his email
Rick Jacobs: I'm going to ask the lawyer about sending him the Krugerrands too because I can have them sent priority and he'd have them in no time at all.
Mary Thomson: no..u dont have to ask any question now..u need the lawyer to represent u in the bank with his power of attorney so u have to follow his instructions on his email so he can be pleased working with u in the bank for this claim
Mary Thomson: first send the death certificate to the bank so we can talk about that
Rick Jacobs: Okay, I'll send the death certificate now....  I just don't trust Western Union at all after my last experience with them, it might actually slow down the whole process.
Mary Thomson: send the email first and we talk about that
Rick Jacobs: Okay.
Rick Jacobs: I just sent the death certificate to the bank.
Mary Thomson: good
Mary Thomson: now listen
Mary Thomson: this is an inheritance claim with a bank here so u have to follow instructions to avoid any form of mistakes which might implicate us in this claim
Mary Thomson: ok?
Rick Jacobs: Okay.
Mary Thomson: yes
Mary Thomson: cos u and i knows this is a false claim on ur name and need to seal all loops from our sides perfectly
Mary Thomson: ok?
Rick Jacobs: I thought you told me that there is no risk in this?
Mary Thomson: yes thats why am telling u this now
Mary Thomson: as long as u follow the bank and lawyers instructions there wont be any at all
Rick Jacobs: It won't hurt to ask him though...  I'm sure he'd understand the situation....
Mary Thomson: thats why i insist u send the money to the lawyer as instructed in his email to u
Mary Thomson: listen..
Rick Jacobs: It just seems really fishy with him only accepting a wire transfer..
Mary Thomson: thats the fastest way to receive money though
Mary Thomson: he needs to visit the bank this morning working hours to normalise this claim on ur behalf
Mary Thomson: and western union is money sent in minutes
Mary Thomson: do u understand that?
Rick Jacobs: I'm sorry, but I will not send that much money Western Union...  I have the money here and I'll be more than glad to send it, but I just don't feel safe using Western Union.
Mary Thomson: dont say a thing like that now
Mary Thomson: u need to follow instructions now
Mary Thomson: i suggest u send him maybe $1,000 for a start to see wat happens
Rick Jacobs: Sending him only $1,000.00 is not following his instructions either...
Mary Thomson: thats to make him understand u are scared of sending much money via western union
Rick Jacobs: I can send him the full amount, but in a way that can be tracked, I had this problem before when I tried sending money to my wife...
Mary Thomson: maybe that will make him understand u can send the rest from south africa as u said
Mary Thomson: ok?
Rick Jacobs: I'm not sending the money from South Africa, I've got the coins here in my home, they are gold coins from South Africa that people in the U.S. invest in.
Mary Thomson: oh i see
Mary Thomson: but this has nothing to do with this claim now
Mary Thomson: so u have to do wat i asked u to do cos i know more than u do here
Rick Jacobs: I just will not use Western Union....
Mary Thomson: send the lawyer $1,000 first via western union and explain to him that u dont feel safe sending him money this way
Rick Jacobs: I'm sure the lawyer will understand, I deal with lawyers all the time..
Mary Thomson: that will make him understand u better
Mary Thomson: here is Nigeria and not USA
Mary Thomson: everything is different from wat u think here in Nigeria
Mary Thomson: believe me..i know wat am telling u here
Rick Jacobs: If he doesn't want my money then I don't want to do business with him.
Mary Thomson: no
Mary Thomson: we need him to make this claim out of my Bank
Mary Thomson: if he agrees working with u without a one on one agreement and wanting to know much about u..this is enough reason to use him cos i dont know who else could do this with us as easy as the lawyer promised to as soon as he receive his service charge
Rick Jacobs: I just won't send money through such an insecure source....
Rick Jacobs: He's got to understand he's dealing with an American too....
Rick Jacobs: I'm sorry, but we happen to run the world now and we call the shots..
Mary Thomson: u got to understand u need him more than he needs u here
Rick Jacobs: I'm financially secure, this will just be a nice retirement boost for me...
Mary Thomson: not in this case now..u have to be very careful so u dont delay this claim and make the bank suspect ur claim
Rick Jacobs: I don't need the money, but it will just be nice to have..
Mary Thomson: i understand u clearly
Mary Thomson: but u ought to understand me as well too
Mary Thomson: we are in  this together and remember i introduced u to this claim in my Bank
Mary Thomson: so i know more than u do here as this is Nigeria and not USA
Mary Thomson: ok?
Rick Jacobs: I know, but I don't need this money, I've got plenty all ready, I'm willing to help you, but I'm not going to use Western Union...
Rick Jacobs: You can use someone else...
Mary Thomson: no u cant stop now
Rick Jacobs: I'm sure if we talk to the lawyer he'll understand..
Mary Thomson: this will make the bank suspect u and investigate more about u
Mary Thomson: not until u follow his first instruction by sending the money via western union as instructed...thats why i advise u send him $1,000 from western union and let him know u dont feel secure sending him money this way so u will send it another way afterwards
Mary Thomson: pls follow instructions so we dont get suspected in this in anyway at all
Rick Jacobs: I just won't do it...  You can find another person if that's the only way the lawyer will take money...
Mary Thomson: ok?
Mary Thomson: how do u mean find another person?
Mary Thomson: the bank already knows about u for this inheritance claim  and replied to ur application for this claim of Late Mark Davidson
Mary Thomson: dont u understand the implications of stopping this claim now?
Mary Thomson: pls dont say a thing like that anymore
Rick Jacobs: Why are you so certain that the lawyer won't take money sent to him an alternative way?
Mary Thomson: we are on the right track and need to work under instructions now to make this claim perfectly
Rick Jacobs: This situation is just starting to sound extremely suspicious to me.
Mary Thomson: i didnt say he wont..but i insist u send at least a part payment to enable him build trust and confidence working on ur behalf in this claim
Rick Jacobs: I won't send a partial payment...  I will send the entire payment if done in a secure fashion.
Mary Thomson: today is tuesday already and the bank will be waiting to hear from ur lawyer
Mary Thomson: the lawyer should be waiting to hear from u as he subjected his email.Get back to me asap
Rick Jacobs: I will tell him my method of payment...  In the United States the person who calls the shots is the person with the money.....
Rick Jacobs: Money talks bullshit walks is the saying..
Mary Thomson: but this is Nigeria not USA
Mary Thomson: not in this claim
Mary Thomson: how much are u sending compared to $11 Million
Rick Jacobs: But you're Nigerians dealing with an American...  Americans call the shots...
Mary Thomson: the lawyer doest even care where u are from
Mary Thomson: ok?
Rick Jacobs: I don't care if he doesn't care...  I'm still calling the shots..
Mary Thomson: all he cares about is that u are his client and will work under his instruction to enable him work with u in this claim
Rick Jacobs: The Nigerian way of doing business is starting to appear as if it's moronic...  No wonder Nigeria is such a shit hole..
Mary Thomson: thats why am making this claim so that i can walk away and invest afterwards in states
Mary Thomson: if u tell him u are an american and will do this ur way..he might decide not to work with u in this claim as u are ignorant to his instructions
Mary Thomson: see words from my point of view here
Mary Thomson: i dont want him to suspect a thing from u by saying u are an american and will do it ur way
Rick Jacobs: Perhaps we should find another lawyer...  I'm sure I can find one that can represent us in this situation..
Mary Thomson: why then do u need him in this claim if u could do it ur way
Mary Thomson: no..u cant find any lawyer
Rick Jacobs: We can do it my way...  I already have lawyers several of them who deal internationally..
Mary Thomson: it doesnt work like that..which lawyer do u want to find under a short space in time
Rick Jacobs: I already have one..
Mary Thomson: the bank is already waiting u
Mary Thomson: no
Mary Thomson: dont tell ur lawyer about this pls
Rick Jacobs: We also have a client/lawyer privilege here so the lawyer would be unable to talk about it to anyone...
Mary Thomson: he knows u arent related to the deceased Late Mark Davidson
Mary Thomson: listen...
Rick Jacobs: I know he doesn't know...  In the United States he still can't talk to anyone...
Mary Thomson: i wont want u to mess this deal up now
Mary Thomson: so listen very attentively
Rick Jacobs: We have laws here that protect us from this kind of thing...  I'll have my lawyer contact you.....
Mary Thomson: no pls
Mary Thomson: why are u saying all this now
Rick Jacobs: Then I'll just ship the money the way I wanted to...
Mary Thomson: wat do i tell ur lawyer?
Mary Thomson: listen
Rick Jacobs: Just tell him the situation, he cannot tell anyone about it because of the laws we have here...
Mary Thomson: no
Rick Jacobs: He'll just cost a little more is all..
Mary Thomson: i wont try it
Mary Thomson: why are telling me all this that doesnt make sense to this claim
Rick Jacobs: Because quite frankly I don't trust any situation which requires such an unsecure mode of payment....   It's quite suspicious...
Mary Thomson: i think u are business inclined..u should know that this is a false claim with my Bank and if anything goes wrong it affects us both and this might put us in trouble
Mary Thomson: i didnyt bargain for any trouble in this claim
Mary Thomson: ok?
Rick Jacobs: I'm very business inclined, I've been quite successful in business and I'll treat this as any other business transaction.
Mary Thomson: wat exactly makes u feel this isnt safe and the lawyer told u to use the method?
Mary Thomson: are u saying u know more than he does and yet require his service?
Rick Jacobs: I feel unsafe because after I lost the $2,000.00 last year using Western Union I did some investigating and found that it's extremely unsafe to use it and not to do it using any business transaction...
Mary Thomson: this is a differnt transaction altogether cos i dont think u are ever did such
Mary Thomson: how did u lost the $2,000?
Mary Thomson: u mean the money didnt get to the receiver?
Rick Jacobs: I sent it to my wife in London after her credit cards were stolen...  It was lost and there was no way to track the money...  I learned a lot about Western Union after that situation and I refuse to use them..
Mary Thomson: so u sent money via western union to ur wife and she didnt receive it yet u couldnt do anything?
Mary Thomson: why?
Mary Thomson: that sounds ridiculous
Rick Jacobs: I'm sure the lawyer won't mind, if I send Krugerrands he'll get more than he's asking for because what he's asking for is the equivalent to five and a half Krugerrands so I'd have to send him six...  He will not mind making hundreds of dollars more by waiting for only a day longer.
Mary Thomson: i will leave to that then
Rick Jacobs: The bank will understand too because they'll understand that they're not dealing with Nigerians...
Mary Thomson: i just dont understand why u wont listen to me
Rick Jacobs: Because I don't do business the Nigerian way even if I'm doing business with Nigerians..
Mary Thomson: if u mess this claim up and the bank suspects u,take note that this is a jailable offense for attempting fasle claim in a bank
Mary Thomson: and u know wat that means?
Rick Jacobs: I do...  It will be fine.
Mary Thomson: this is not any kind of business but a sensitive one
Mary Thomson: this is where the risk lies now
Mary Thomson: cos i didnt bargain for this in anyway
Rick Jacobs: I didn't bargain for this either...
Mary Thomson: all i wanted is to get this money perfectly which i explained everything to u
Mary Thomson: dont u think u are going wat too far bringing in ur own conclusion without wanting to know want it might cause us
Mary Thomson: ?????
Rick Jacobs: I'm not worried about jail, in the United States crimes like these are extremely petty and at most I'd get a small fine.
Mary Thomson: u think so?
Mary Thomson: have u ever heard of the charges laid for false claim with a bank?
Mary Thomson: such as this which u are involved?
Rick Jacobs: Maybe in Nigeria....
Rick Jacobs: I'm not concerned nor can I understand why you are so concerned about it..
Mary Thomson: cos i will be involved in anyway
Mary Thomson: if it goes wrong
Mary Thomson: u sound like u dont know wat we are into now
Rick Jacobs: I know what we are into, I think you're just being a little dramatic about my choosing a slightly different mode of payment.
Mary Thomson: thats where u get it all wrong
Mary Thomson: cos if u really know wat we are into u wont argue over this knowing wat delays might cause us now that the bank is already waiting on u for these documents for approval of ur inheritance claim
Rick Jacobs: I'm sure the lawyer will understand and perhaps even front the money once he receives a tracking number from Federal Express....
Mary Thomson: we need the lawyer here to work on ur behalf and he requires his fees sent to him via western union
Mary Thomson: please urself now
Rick Jacobs: I'm sure he won't mind....
Mary Thomson: this will take more time than required now
Rick Jacobs: If he does he's certainly not a lawyer that I would want representing me...
Mary Thomson: he should be in the bank this morning for this claim to be normalised
Mary Thomson: then which lawyer do u want to represent u knowing the kind of claim we are into
Rick Jacobs: I can have my lawyer represent us....
Rick Jacobs: He's very good....
Mary Thomson: U CANT
Mary Thomson: I SAID NO
Mary Thomson: NO AND NO
Mary Thomson: OK?
Mary Thomson: AM NOT IN THIS WITH U THAT WAY
Rick Jacobs: There's nothing to worry about with American lawyers....
Mary Thomson: U DONT BRING IN IDEAS THAT I DONT BUY AT ALL
Mary Thomson: I AM
Mary Thomson: DONT EVEN THINK OF IT
Mary Thomson: COS I WONT BE A PART OF THAT
Mary Thomson: FIRST HE KNOWS U COMPLETELY AND KNOWS U ARENT RELATED TO THIS LATE MARK DAVIDSON
Rick Jacobs: He wouldn't care if I wasn't related to him....
Mary Thomson: SECONDLY HE CANT BE HERE IN MINUTES
Mary Thomson: HOW DO U MEAN?
Mary Thomson: ANYWAY I WONT BE PART OF THAT THOUGH
Rick Jacobs: American lawyers are paid to represent people, they don't care of people are lying or not....
Mary Thomson: SO DONT BRING THAT IDEA TO ME NOW COS I WONT BE PART OF IT
Rick Jacobs: I think I'll call him here in awhile and ask him if he could without giving him any names or anything...
Mary Thomson: WHO ARE U TALKING ABOUT?
Rick Jacobs: One of the lawyers I do business with all the time....
Mary Thomson: NO
Mary Thomson: NO
Mary Thomson: NO
Mary Thomson: NO
Mary Thomson: NO
Rick Jacobs: He's represented me for years...
Mary Thomson: NO
Mary Thomson: NO
Mary Thomson: I SAID NO
Mary Thomson: I SAID NO
Mary Thomson: I SAID NO
Mary Thomson: STOP NOW
Rick Jacobs: So I guess I can just ship the money?
Mary Thomson: WILL U LISTEN TO ME NOW
Rick Jacobs: In a nice normal fashion like real people in the real world do?
Mary Thomson: ????
Mary Thomson: WILL U LISTEN TO ME NOW
Mary Thomson: ????
Mary Thomson: WILL U??????
Rick Jacobs: I'll listen to you, but I will not use Western Union...
Mary Thomson: WATS UR POINT HERE NOW?
Rick Jacobs: That anyone who uses that mode of payment is suspicious....
Mary Thomson: COS THIS MEANS U ARENT LISTENING IF U INSIST U WONT USE WESTERN UNION
Mary Thomson: I GAVE U A GOOD REASON FOR THAT
Mary Thomson: THIS MONEY NEEDS TO BE HERE IN MINUTES COS THE LAWYER NEEDS TO VISIT THE BANK THIS MORNING
Rick Jacobs: He never mentioned anything about that in the email....
Mary Thomson: WE HAVE BARELY 4HRS TO OFFICES OPENING HERE
Mary Thomson: his subject was get back to me asap
Mary Thomson: HE KNOWS THIS IS AN INHERITANCE CLAIM AND NEED TO BE TREATED WITH URGENCY
Rick Jacobs: I'll get back to him ASAP and explain to him how he's getting paid, if he won't accept my mode of payment I'll have the lawyer who has represented me for years now represent me in this situation...
Mary Thomson: WAT DO U REALLY KNOW ABOUT INHERITANCE CLAIM ESPECIALLY A FALSE CLAIM
Mary Thomson: U DONT MENTION UR LAWYER TO ME HERE AGAIN PLS
Mary Thomson: IM NOT INTERESTED IN UR LAWYER
Mary Thomson: I TOLD U ABOUT THIS DEAL AND NOT U TOLD ME
Rick Jacobs: You have nothing to worry about with my lawyer....  He's very safe...
Mary Thomson: SO WAT DO KNOW ABOUT THIS CLAIM OF I MAY ASK?
Mary Thomson: I DONT NEED UR LAWYER
Mary Thomson: I GOT A LAWYER TOO
Rick Jacobs: He'll represent us knowing all of the information which will let him represent us a lot better....
Rick Jacobs: I know, but yours is Nigerian...
Mary Thomson: I NEVER INVOLVED HIM COS I KNOW ITS NOT DONE LIKE THAT
Mary Thomson: THIS IS A TOP SECRET AM TELLING U ABOUT HERE
Mary Thomson: IM NOT IN THAT WITH U
Mary Thomson: OK?
Rick Jacobs: I don't think you have a choice.....
Mary Thomson: DO U HAVE A CHOICE AS WELL?
Mary Thomson: MAYBE U FAIL TO UNDERSTAND U ARE DEALING WITH A NIGERIAN BANK AND NOT US BANK
Rick Jacobs: The lawyer can take my money and if he doesn't want my money my lawyer will be more than glad to take it.
Mary Thomson: WAT DOES UR LAWYER HAVE TO DO IN THIS?
Mary Thomson: HOW DOES HE GET THE REQUESTED DOCUMENTS OVER THERE TO MY BANK IN PERSON?
Rick Jacobs: He can get them from the lawyer that has them...  It's common practice...
Mary Thomson: U DONT EVEN REASON MATURED HERE LIKE U SAID U HAVE DONE SO MANY BUSINESSES AND KNOWS WAT IT ENTAILS
Mary Thomson: WHICH LAWYER HAS THEM?
Mary Thomson: ARE U OUT OF UR MIND?
Mary Thomson: ARE U KIDDING OR WAT?
Rick Jacobs: Not at all....  I'm surprised I didn't talk to my lawyer from the beginning...  He's handled millions of dollars worth of financial cases for me and is quite good...
Mary Thomson: NOT IN THIS CASE
Rick Jacobs: He's also dealt with other lawyers to get what's needed to win a case...
Mary Thomson: I TOLD U B4 NOW THIS IS TOP SECRET DEAL
Mary Thomson: NOT EVERYTHING U DO U INVOLVE UR LAWYER ESPECIALLY A CASE LIKE THIS
Mary Thomson: THIS DOCUMENTS NEEDS TO BE PROVIDED HERE IN NIGERIA NOT THERE IN USA
Rick Jacobs: It might be a top secret deal in Nigeria, but in the U.S. we have the lawyer client privilege....
Rick Jacobs: My lawyer can get the documents, I'm sure of it...
Mary Thomson: HE CANT GET THESE ONES REQUESTED
Rick Jacobs: Here we can tell a lawyer anything.....
Rick Jacobs: I'm sure he can...  He does that kind of stuff for a living...
Mary Thomson: NOT SOMETHING LIKE THIS WHICH AM 100% SURE HE WONT ADVISE U TO DO
Mary Thomson: HE KNOWS U ARENT RELATED TO THIS MAN AND WONT BE A PART TO THIS AS HIS LEGAL CAREER WILL BE AT STAKE IF THIS FAILS
Rick Jacobs: I'm sure if my lawyer knew of the amount of money at stake he'd fly to Nigeria to represent me...  It would probably look a lot better with an American lawyer representing me at the bank anyways...
Mary Thomson: WE DONT NEED HIM IN THIS CLAIM COS HE ISNT IN NIGERIA AND CANT GET THESE DOCUMENTS
Mary Thomson: ESPECIALLY THIS VERY ONE:  A Sworn Affidavite on your name as the relation to Mark Davidson
Rick Jacobs: I don't see what the difference between the lawyers would be..
Mary Thomson: THIS DOCUMENT NEEDS TO BE PROVIDED IN THE FEDERAL MINISTRY OF JUSTICE HERE AS HE WILL BE PRESENT AT THE OATH SWEARING AND WILL APPEND HIS SIGNATORYS TO THE DOCUMENT AS WELL
Rick Jacobs: I'm sure there won't be a problem...
Mary Thomson: THIS IS WHY WE NEED THIS LAWYER HERE IN NIGERIA
Rick Jacobs: I'll call him now and find out for sure if he can do this or not, don't worry, he won't say a thing...
Rick Jacobs: It'll be a good to know at least...
Mary Thomson: I WILL NOT SAY MUCH ON THIS AGAIN AS IT SEEMS U GOT PLANS TO JEOPARDIZE THIS DEAL AND PUT US BEHIND BARS
Rick Jacobs: Not at all....
Mary Thomson: I HAVE SPENT MY WHOLE LIFE SAVINGS ON THIS AND STILL OWE MY BANK FOR THE LOAN I TOOK
Mary Thomson: I RATHER KILL MYSELF THAN FACE THIS SHAME WITH U CONSIDERING MY JOB AND FAMILY HERE
Rick Jacobs: Americans are by nature far smarter and better educated than Nigerians, I'm sure my lawyer would be far better in about any situation.....
Mary Thomson: THATS AN INSULT TO ME
Mary Thomson: I WONT LET U INSULT ME HERE FOR ANY REASONS
Mary Thomson: HOW SMART ARE U AND U LOOSED UR MONEY TO WESTERN UNION AND U COULDNT DO A THING
Mary Thomson: WATS SMART ABOUT THAT?
Mary Thomson: TELL ME
Rick Jacobs: I think you're not giving me enough credit here buddy.....  I saw through your little 419 scam the second you posted it...  It's a childish way to make a living..
Rick Jacobs: Seriously dude, get a real job....  You're a pathetic piece of shit......
Mary Thomson: U COULDNT EVEN INVOLVE UR LAWYER IN SUCH A GENUINE CASE AND NOW U WANT TO INVOLVE HIM IN THIS VERY ONE U KNOW ITS ILLEGAL IF CAUGHT IN THE ACT
Rick Jacobs: Aren't you smart enough to realize what I just accused you of?
Mary Thomson: WAT ARE U TALKING ABOUT?
Rick Jacobs: The Nigerian scam....  The 419 scam......  It's about the oldest scam in the book and you're trying to pull it...
Mary Thomson: AM NOT HERE FOR THIS
Mary Thomson: OK?
Rick Jacobs: You're some dumbass sitting in an internet cafe without a real job....
Mary Thomson: I TOLD U FROM THE START,THIS HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH SCAM
Rick Jacobs: You pulled the picture of the lady off of the net....
Mary Thomson: AM REAL AND KNOW WAT AM TELLING U HERE
Rick Jacobs: You're far from real, your corrupt little country is full of worthless scum bags like yourself, I'm just glad I've wasted enough of your time over the past day or so to keep you from preying on honest hard working people...
Rick Jacobs: In the United State the majority of the population has jobs...  You need to get one..
Mary Thomson: I DONT GET U RIGHT?
Rick Jacobs: No!!  You didn't get me!!! 
Mary Thomson: EXPLAIN PLS
Rick Jacobs: My plan was to send you a goddam brick in the mail COD so you would have to pay for it when it showed up, that's the real reason I wasn't going to use Western Union...
Mary Thomson: AM 100% SURE OF THIS CLAIM AS AM AN INSIDER IN THIS SAME BANK AM TELLING U ABOUT
Rick Jacobs: God, how stupid can you be!!!
Mary Thomson: AM NOT HERE TO KID
Mary Thomson: OK?
Rick Jacobs: Ummmm, do you have difficulties when you aren't following the script?
Mary Thomson: IF U THINK U CAN MESS WITH THIS CLAIM AND GET AWAY WITH IT FREELY THAT MEANS U DONT KNOW WAT U JUST INVOLVED URSELF
Rick Jacobs: Hold on one second, I'll send you something that might better explain to you what I'm saying...
Mary Thomson: I NEVER BARGAINED FOR THIS AS I PLANNED THIS PERFECTLY
Mary Thomson: SO DONT MESS IT UP SO U DONT LAND US IN JAIL
Rick Jacobs: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/419_scam  Does this explain it to you any better?
Mary Thomson: I READ THIS MANY TIMES
Mary Thomson: IM A BANKER
Mary Thomson: THATS WHY I TOLD U FROM THE START THAT ALOT OF SCAM IS GOING ON THESE DAYS
Rick Jacobs: God you're stupid...  Everything you've talked about with me from the very first message has been by the script, now that we've left the script you're all over the place....  I don't see how I could be more clear about this...
Rick Jacobs: My real name is not Rick Jacobs, that was not a picture of me, that is not my real phone number and I've never believed a claim that you've made....
Mary Thomson: NOW I SEE WAT U ARE UP TO
Mary Thomson: WELL..I WILL LEAVE THAT TO THE BANK TO HANDLE
Rick Jacobs: Would you like me to send your IP address to the proper authorities?
Mary Thomson: I WILL HAVE TO FLEE AWAY AS SOON AS THIS BACK FIRES COS I WILL KNOW B4 U DO AS I WONT FACE THIS SHAME WITH U
Mary Thomson: I RATHER KILL MYSELF THAN FACE THIS SHAME WITH U CONSIDERING MY JOB AND FAMILY
Rick Jacobs: You're not even a woman, you're some worthless dirtbag hunkered over a computer in an internet cafe spending your days scamming as much money as you can from hard working people..
Rick Jacobs: Don't you get it? 
Mary Thomson: I DONT KNOW WAT U ARE TALKING ABOUT
Rick Jacobs: All the emails from the lawyer, the bank all come from the same person….
Mary Thomson: JUST PLEASE URSELF AS U SO WISH
Rick Jacobs: You’re all one and the same person…..
Mary Thomson: HOW DO U MEAN?
Mary Thomson: WE ARE ALL IN SAME LOCATION SO WAT ARE U TALKING ABOUT HERE
Mary Thomson: HERE IS LAGOS NIGERIA
Rick Jacobs: I mean that I've known since yesterday that you, the lawyer, and the bank are the same person...
Mary Thomson: NO
Mary Thomson: WE ARENT
Mary Thomson: I ONLY WORK IN THIS BANK AS I TOLD U B4
Rick Jacobs: I've just been having fun wasting your time and keeping you from scamming others, what do I have to do to get this through your thick skull?
Mary Thomson: WAT WILL I GAIN IF I LIE TO U?
Mary Thomson: I GUESS U ARE KIDDING COS THIS IS REAL
Rick Jacobs: By lying to me you will gain the $4,370.00 that was supposed to go the "lawyer"....
Mary Thomson: WATS 4370 COMPARED TO $11 MILLION?
Mary Thomson: ARE U KIDDING OR WAT?
Rick Jacobs: I guess you're right, $4,370.00 isn't that much money compared to $11,000,000.00 but I'd only get 30% of that $11,000,000.00....  I want more!!
Mary Thomson: AM NOT HERE TO KID PLS
Mary Thomson: I WILL LEAVE U AT THAT TO PLEASE URSELF
Rick Jacobs: How about 40%?
Mary Thomson: IF U DELAY THIS CLAIM LONGER THAN EXPECTED THE BANK WILL SUSPECT U AND COME AFTER U FOR INVESTIGATIONS
Rick Jacobs: It won't delay things any longer if you give 40%....
Rick Jacobs: That would help make up for that $4,370.00....
Mary Thomson: U SEEM TO JOKE ALOT WITH THIS
Mary Thomson: WELL..WE SEE WAT HAPPENS
Rick Jacobs: I am joking a lot with this because that's all it is to me...  I've tried explaining that to you already....
Mary Thomson: WAT DO U KNOW U ARE EXPLAINING?
Mary Thomson: I TOLD U ABOUT THIS DEAL SO WAT DO U THINK U KNOW ABOUT THIS
Mary Thomson: ARE U BEING GREEDY OR WAT?
Rick Jacobs: Would you like me to explain what I know again from the beginning?
Mary Thomson: WAT?
Rick Jacobs: Because it's very difficult dealing with someone as dumb as yourself, it was kinda fun at first, but now it's getting annoying...
Mary Thomson: WAT ARE U TALKING ABOUT?
Rick Jacobs: Okay, I knew from the second that you told me about American that was killed and the eleven million dollars in the bank that it was all a lie.....
Mary Thomson: ITS TRUE
Rick Jacobs: It's known in the United States as the Nigerian scam or the 419 scam...
Mary Thomson: I DONT LIE
Mary Thomson: WHY SHOULD I LIE?
Rick Jacobs: So I decided that for shits and giggles that I would play around with your little story and have some fun at your expense....
Mary Thomson: THIS HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH SCAM
Mary Thomson: LISTEN
Rick Jacobs: I played the part, provided a fake name, provided a fake phone # (go ahead and call it!!), and then just played along as if I wasn't any the wiser...
Mary Thomson: MILLIONS OF AFRICANS TRANSFER FUNDS OUT OF THE COUNTRY EVERYDAY AND ANYONE THAT FAIL IS BEING APPREHENDED AND EXPOSED ALL OVER THE INTERNET
Mary Thomson: PEOPLE USE THIS WAY TO MAKE MONEY
Mary Thomson: IM 100% SURE OF WAT AM TELLING U COS IM REAL
Rick Jacobs: I knew you were going to ask for Western Union because that's typical for people in your line of work...  And yes, I know that you and the lawyer are one and the same person...
Rick Jacobs: I never intended on sending you any gold coins....
Rick Jacobs: I was intending to mail you a goddam brick.....
Mary Thomson: I DONT KNOW WAT U ARE TALKING ABOUT
Mary Thomson: DONT PUT US IN TROUBLE NOW
Mary Thomson: IF THE BANK WAITS LONGER THAN REQUIRED U WILL BE TRACED AND APPPREHNDED FOR FALSE CLAIM
Rick Jacobs: So now I'm thinking that you're getting paid an hourly wage because quite frankly I don't know why you would hang on to this scam for so long considering it's a total failure...
Mary Thomson: THIS IS NOT SCAM
Mary Thomson: I KEEP TELLING U THIS BUT U WONT LISTEN
Mary Thomson: MAYBE WHEN THIS BACK FIRES U LIVE TO REGRET UR ACTIONS TODAY
Rick Jacobs: I'm still confused here, are you really so stupid that you don't know what I'm telling you?
Mary Thomson: MAYBE U ARE STUPID NOT ME
Mary Thomson: COS THIS WILL BACK FIRE REAL SOON AND U WILL LIVE TO REGRET THIS DAY
Rick Jacobs: That really hurt my feelings...  Don't call me stupid!!  The kids at school did that!!
Mary Thomson: U MUST BE OUT OF UR MIND
Rick Jacobs: I was kinda thinkin' the same thing about you...
Rick Jacobs: You don't seem like such a bad feller, kinda dumb but likeable in some weird fucked up way...
Rick Jacobs: How much do they pay you guys an hour to do this kinda work?
Mary Thomson: WAT ARE U TALKING ABOUT?
Mary Thomson: ARE U INSANE?
Rick Jacobs: No, I'm not insane, I'm onto the fact that you're a scammer, nothin' wrong with that, go for the dumbasses out there....  I'm just kinda curious how well it pays...
Mary Thomson: AM REAL
Mary Thomson: I DONT SCAM PEOPLE
Mary Thomson: OK?
Rick Jacobs: Yea, a real scammer, we've already determined that...
Mary Thomson: AM ONLY HERE TO UTILISE THIS LIFETIME OPPORTUNITY
Rick Jacobs: Probably is a good opportunity in Nigeria....
Mary Thomson: I NOTICED THIS DORMANT ACCOUNT AS AN INSIDER IN THIS SAME BANK
Rick Jacobs: So that's why the emails came from the same place?
Rick Jacobs: You ever watch those cowboy movies?
Mary Thomson: WHICH EMAILS COME FROM THE SAME PLACE
Rick Jacobs: Like all of them..  The lawyer ones, the bank ones and the ones you've sent me...
Rick Jacobs: But you didn't answer my question about watchin' old cowboy movies...
Mary Thomson: THATS A BIG LIE
Rick Jacobs: I kinda like them...
Mary Thomson: NOW I SEE U DONT EVEN KNOW WAT U ARE SAYING
Rick Jacobs: I'm just talkin' about old cowboy movies....
Mary Thomson: HOW DOES THE BANK MAIL AND LAWYER MAIL INCLUDING MINE COME FROM SAME PLACE
Rick Jacobs: Seems like I've made a friend here, a rather confused friend, but still it's all good...
Mary Thomson: HOW???
Rick Jacobs: Let's not talk about this now, let's talk about cowboy movies...
Mary Thomson: U MUST BE CRAZY
Mary Thomson: I WILL LEAVE U HERE NOW
Rick Jacobs: Nothin' crazy about liking cowboy movies!!
Mary Thomson: WATEVER COMES OUT OF THIS WE SHALL SEE
Rick Jacobs: C'mon stay!!
Rick Jacobs: What kind of movies do you like?
Mary Thomson: I HAVE WORK TODAY
Rick Jacobs: I kinda doubt that... 
Mary Thomson: LESS THAN 3HRS I WILL OFF TO WORK
Rick Jacobs: Then we've got three hours to talk!!
Rick Jacobs: I wanna talk about cowboy movies!!
Mary Thomson: TAKE CARE OF URSELF
Mary Thomson: BYE\

Auto-edited on 2020-08-02 to update URLs